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Five Keys to Finding Alignment in Your Relationship.

You may be reading this and wondering what alignment means. Merriam-Webster defines alignment as the state or condition of agreeing with or matching something else. Artist Dismoc Le Ma created an exhibition centered around alignment. The exhibition, entitled "Respect! The Woman In Red Dress" explores the essential functions of alignment. To find out more information about the exhibition, please go to The picture presented with this blog is part of the exhibition. Key elements of this painting are essential to having alignment in a relationship. These keys are the following: flexibility, communication, and mending. Now you may be wondering how this painting depicts these keys? First, I will explain the five keys: First Key: Flexibility Having flexibility in your relationship is essential. The ability to compromise and see the other person's side can be crucial in a relationship. Merriam-Webster defines flexibility as the ready capability to adapt to new, different, or changing requirements. As mentioned before, one of the key elements in the painting associated with this blog is flexibility. Life is in constant motion, and being aligned with your partner means you are continuously on a path of stability. On that journey of stability, your relationship may encounter roadblocks that can potentially knock you off course. By having the ability to be flexible, you'll be able to adapt to new changes in life. In the painting, you'll see two human-like figures, one of which is above the other. As well, you will see three small triangular figures that are between the human life figures. These triangular figures represent roadblocks that may occur in your relationship. The two human life figures are currently unaligned. However, the large red triangular figure represents a balance beam. If you take a step back from the painting, you'll see that the painting is in motion. This represents two people navigating through these roadblocks while trying to become aligned with each other. The second key: Communication An aligned relationship allows both parties to express their opinions while also listening to others express theirs. After hearing each point, they will find a solution to their issue. Merriam-Webster defines communication as the act or process of using words, sounds, signs, or behaviors to express or exchange information or to express your ideas, thoughts, feelings, etc., to someone else. As stated before, one of the key elements in the painting associated with this blog is communication. If you look deeply into the painting, you'll see words in the background. The painting doesn't only represent communication with words, but also expressions, feelings, thoughts, and signs. Third Key: Mending Why is mending an essential key, you may be wondering? First, let's understand what "mending" means. To fix, to repair, Merriam-Webster defines mending as to improve or strengthen by negotiation or conciliation. The key reason this is essential is that you find solutions to issues vs trying to be right. Case in point, you're having a dispute with your partner. Going back to the second key communication, with good communication, most problems can be resolved. However, when emotions are added to the equation, good communication can fall short on unheard ears. Sometimes emotional acts such as pettiness can occur when feelings are provoked. This can cause heated arguments or worse. However, one must understand that you argue to mend rather than to be right. Some would dispute that mending and communication go hand in hand. That's true, however, it doesn't take good communication to say you're sorry. It doesn't take good communication to change your actions. It doesn't take good communication to understand that, my actions resulted in you being hurt. So I will mend this situation by preventing this action from ever happening again. As stated previously, the last key element in the painting associated with this blog is mending. Notice in the painting that there's a split heart between the two human-like figures. This can be seen as a love loss, but it actually symbolizes the mending of two hearts. While on the journey of finding alignment, certain roadblocks may cause disruption in your relationship. If you have the ability to mend your mistakes, then you have the ability to weather any storm. Fourth Key: Honesty As they typically say, "honesty is the best policy," or is it? There are a place and time for all honesty. But some truths need to be handled with delicacy. However, the focus of honesty in this post is not about telling the truth but avoiding being passive-aggressive. Merriam-Webster defines honesty as the adherence to the facts. To conform in a relationship to avoid confrontation may resolve the issue now. However, that issue will recur because you did not state your honest feelings towards that situation. In aligned relationships, you find ways to communicate your feelings and thoughts and take accountability for your actions. Fifth Key: Realistic Expectations As mentioned previously in the third key: Mending, "I will mend this situation by preventing this action from ever happening again." Keyword preventing, it was never stated, "I won't do it again." Preventing means, "I'm going to try" or "I'm going to work on it." That's an example of stating realistic expectations. You can't expect a person to change in one day. But you can expect a person to make a continuous, conscious effort to change. However, you don't measure that change within a timeframe. You reflect on your partner's present patterns vs old patterns. Case in point, "You always come home late" or "You never want to help me clean up." As mentioned before in the previous keys, if you have an issue with your partner, you have to communicate (second key) that issue to them. While communicating, you also have to be honest (fourth key) about your feelings with your partner. As well, you have to listen to your partner's point of view and be flexible (first key) to their needs and thoughts. Once your partner has stated their thoughts, then you have to be willing to mend (third key) the issue at hand. When you say "never, always, rarely, sometimes" and whatever other negative connotation you can think of, these are dangerous words to put on a person and could potentially lead to an argument. When you set unrealistic expectations, you find yourself in a wormhole. Focus on the improvements your partner has made and try to assist them in becoming better. Case in point, your partner comes home five hours late after work every day. You have a conversation with them about it, and they tell you they spend most of that time talking to co-workers and the rest of the time stuck in traffic. After that conversation, they came home two hours late three days a week instead. Improvements are made, but you feel that isn't enough. Instead of venting your frustration, as mentioned before, you can assist your partner. In this scenario, you can text or call your partner after work, reminding them to make it home promptly. If you follow these five keys, then you are on a great path to finding alignment in your relationship. If you enjoyed the painting associated with this post, please go to to find out more information about it.


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Davion "Dismoc Le Ma" Coleman

– Chief Editor Artist | Designer | Illustrator | Author

– The Creator of The Kre8ive Shop


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